Friday, September 28, 2007

2:17

and word count for my sermon is ZERO.
I have to write it today.
I have done a ton of reading, I have a title, but no words.

Venus got a lovely walk, and now I think I might just need to exercise more to try and work it out of me.

I would like to have a healthy draft in two hours.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Tired.

How can it be Tuesday, and I am already tired...the week is just beginning! This makes no sense whatsoever to me. I slept last night, I exercised this morning, I planted trees today...well, it was hot, so maybe that is why I am feeling a little fatigued--too much time in the sun.
In any case,
I just don't have time right now to be tired.
Maybe I just need to hydrate some more.
Sigh.

Monday, September 17, 2007

hands

last week, a 93 year old woman in my congregation taught me to knit. I am so excited...I have wanted to learn knitting for some time now, and I am thrilled-da-dilled. I know crocheting, which I love--I even learned how to crochet beaded bangle bracelets...and pottery is my love, although I feel like I have backslid somewhat in that area...

I just find that when I am doing something with my hands, creating with my hands, I am most happy. I need to find a way to integrate this into my current ministry setting, as I haven't found the place or way yet...I pray that it will emerge.

Ministry of art, of creating, is important to me..and it is definitely a part of my calling......

Friday, September 14, 2007

a meeting? meetings???

Today's Friday five is about meetings, which I certainly have STRONG feelings about...
1. What's your view of meetings? Choose one or more, or make up your own:
a) When they're good, they're good. I love the feeling of people working well together on a common goal.
b) I don't seek them out, but I recognize them as a necessary part of life.
c) The only good meeting is a canceled meeting.
d) Meetings have three requirements for me: chocolate, an agenda, and time limit. Chocolate is negotiable, but the other two are essential....

2. Do you like some amount of community building or conversation, or are you all business? I like community building, especially in church meetings. All of our commissions begin with a ritual that the chair coordinates...it is either prayer, a reflection, sharing...yesterday, at a Mass conference task force meeting, we sang a song. It reminds us of why we are doing the work we are doing....

3. How do you feel about leading meetings? Share any particular strengths or weaknesses you have in this area. Even though I don't LOVE meetings, I do like to lead them. HOW weird is that? I just think that people volunteer precious time in the church, so if I am responsible for convening and facilitating a meeting, it should be an experience, and not drudgery...and respectful of people's time and energy and gifts.

4. Have you ever participated in a virtual meeting? (conference call, IM, chat, etc.) What do you think of this format? Conference calls. When living in NC, I was on a board of a state-wide non-profit, so every meeting there were people that couldn't be there in person, so we always had the option of being present by phone. Last winter/spring I participated in the planning of the worship for Christian Peace Witness
at the National Cathedral in DC, and that whole event/march was planned on conference calls, because the leadership was gleaned from across the country. At first it was a little weird, b/c you have to keep identifying yourself, but work was efficient.


5. Share a story of a memorable meeting you attended. This week we had our first coordinating council meeting for the program year. My colleague led an amazing reflection which invited people to share where they experienced the holy this summer. People were amazingly sincere, vulnerable, and reflective. It was a spiritually moving experience in the midst of going over budgets, scheduling, etc. I found it very moving and energizing and bonding.

Thursday, September 06, 2007

Rico's Bounty


Today I such a lovely encounter in the midst of the CRAZINESS of work right now. Note to self: In one's first fall in a new congregation in the midst of a construction project, do NOT, do not, do not do not PLAN a membership/community event on Friday night when Teacher orientation and opening of Sunday School is on Saturday and Sunday. Do not believe construction people on Monday who say everything will be fine, because inevitably, on Wednesday at noon, they will tell you half of your rooms will be inaccessible. This will take some time to Sort Out, and you don't have to be running around finding ice cream scoops and blowing up balloons for the community event, which will be fun and wondrous, when it finally happens....Do not, either, allow for scheduling a funeral on same Saturday at same time of Teacher Orientation (there are times that this cannot be helped, but....)where all (teachers, funeral goers will have to use the same entrance. This will cause more Shifting and Sorting on your part, thus leaving Precious Little Time to get at the meat of everything, e.g. content of curriculum, because you are wondering if the fridge that you counted on in the kitchen is even working, and you wonder how the heck you are going to keep that ice cream from melting while you are trying to learn the church database system to make your life more streamlined but instead complicates A Lot. But I digress.

My lovely encounter. In the midst of craziness, Buster, our wondercat, has taken up strange behaviour. The last couple of days he will rub up against us and beg to be scratched and then get all close, and then squat and pee exactly two drops...on your shoe; or this morning, on the bed (ylech). Clearly there is a message in this and upon calling the Vet, it appears it could be an emergency (crystals, urinary tract blockage, and all Horrors such as this.) So it fell to me to have to leave the office to take Bussy to the doctor. Well, Bussy, being a Kentucky horse farm barn cat rescue, prefers to be outside during the day, against our wishes. I was calling and calling for him (he has a hiding place) and the old Italian man, sitting on his stoop across the street yelled at me, "Who are you looking for"

So I walked across the street to talk to him to tell him I was looking for the black and white cat without a tail. He nodded and in his thick accent said he hadn't seen him, but he knew the cat. Then he said, "you want some cucumbers? I give you some tomatoes, too" And we walked over to his voluptuous garden and he gave me cukes, roma tomatoes, celery, basil...and we talked about his medical emergency the other night (This is our first conversation ever, although I do wave at him when we walk the dogs)...and he taught me "come here with me" in Italian. He asked my name, and said, "oh is beautiful name" and I asked him his, and he said "Rico" I tried to roll my r the way he did when I repeated it, and he said, "It is really Enrico, but they call me Rico"...so I asked, "is it o.k. if I call you Rico, too?" and he smiled and patted me on the back, and he said, "it would be a pleasure to me."

So, I hadn't found Bussy yet, so I took my booty home and arranged it on a plate just to look at it and smell the basil and tomatoes. I went back out, and a lost car driver was wandering down our dead end, so I gave him some directions, and as he sped off, Rico was yelling to me from across the way, "Kar-La , Kar-La" and pointing with his cane to my neighbor's yard. It was Bussy, hiding in the bushes. I went over, scooped his little tuxedo tail-less self up, and turned around and gave a thumbs up to Rico, who made a circle with his finger and thumb and gave me a nod and wink.

Awww. I made a friend today with my neighbor.
And....
I went and bought a ball of fresh mozarella to make a nice fresh tomato basil salad tonight. Yum.
Life is rich with bounty and produce and neighbors like Rico.
Amen.

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

this is the gig....


I totally don't have time to write right now...
I totally don't have time to walk Venus right now....
I totally don't have time to exercise right now...

but I totally won't have time later, either...
and since this is the first day of the program year in my congregation, and next weekend is the big hurrah...
I am not going to let myself get swallowed by it.

It would be oh so easy (after I have already scrubbed the kitchen and done several work emails) just to jump in the shower, and rush off to the office and be there for 13 hours working, working, working.

But I know better. And I love myself better.

So, Venus, get your leash!
We are off to the park....TOTALLY.

How are you lovin' yourself this fall?

Dear Sweet Lord,
infuse Your breath of peace, Your fullness of presence, and Your heart of compassion within the work and love you call me to be and do today. Amen.

Friday, August 31, 2007

Season's Change Friday Five...


RevGalBlogPal's are celebrating Summer's Last Hurrah....Here is how I am celebrating with Friday Five...

1. Share a highlight from this summer. (If you please, don't just say "our vacation to the Canadian Rockies." Give us a little detail or image. Help us live vicariously through you!) Hiking the Red Rocks in Sedona. One day, I planned mini-hikes to the four vortexes. At each vortex, we created our own ritual. At one, I did the yoga pose of the Tree for a few minutes, at another, we built a cairn, at the third, I did meditative breathing, and by the fourth, it was so durn hot (100 plus degrees) I just hugged a twisted juniper tree.

2. Are you glad to see this summer end? Why or why not? When I was teaching and a college chaplain, I was on ten month contracts. Oh, how wonderful. I was more in touch with the transition of the seasons, then. This has been an acutely busy summer, (aside from a few days away), so I am neither glad or sad to see the summer end. It has been full, it has been rich...I would have loved to hike more, bike more, throw more bowls and mugs....but today, I just feel grateful. For the cooler breeze coming in the window, and the warmth that will spread in the afternoon.


3. Name one or two things you're looking forward to this fall.
It is my first fall with my congregation, so professionally, it is all new. We have some age old events that people gather for--a fall fair, thanksgiving dinner, spiritual life retreat...so I look forward to those experiences of community. I also very much look forward to hiking some weekends surrounded by the burst of light and color held in the trees, and of course, apple picking!

4. Do you have any special preparations or activities to mark the transition from one season to another? (Cleaning of house, putting away summer clothes, one last trip to the beach) My birthday always falls around Labor Day, and I was also ordained on my birthday, so it is a special time. Celebrating my birthday and remembering my ordination pulls me through the liminal space. It is fabulous to honor transition with celebration and cake, don't you think?

5. I'll know that fall is really here when: It's all about the clothes!!! When I can't get away with not wearing socks anymore because my feet get cold! I also love wearing chunky sweaters and tights with skirts and not getting hot.

quiet....

My inside voice has been very quiet the the last couple of weeks.
After vacation,
I haven't been led to articulate the unformed thoughts and unfinished prayers in my soul.
It is still and full and Much Within.
Perhaps, because things are so busy and articulate and communicative in my work right now that what my heartplace needs is to
be silent.
be still.
ponder quietly within.

Come, Spirit, Come...and join me here.
OR maybe I am finally joining YOU here.
Amen.

Thursday, August 09, 2007

goin' on VACA-TION


At my house, tonight we are all doin' the happy vacation dance and song!!!
even though we haven't started packing, our flight leaves at 6:00 a.m.
we are going to SEDONA. I have never been to the Southwest before, in spite of growing up in the upper midwest. And, I am especially excited about Sedona because of all the spiritual energy there. I am going to soak it all up!

Last year, we didn't take vacation, because we were busy moving to New England...and then I didn't work for seven months, except for temping, and then I started in this new parish in April, and I really haven't had much time off--except for the quick trip to Cleveland to watch the Sox play the Indians, but we spent two of the three days stuck in airports. The games were fun, but not the traveling!!!

I am ready...just to be away from everything except my beloved for ten straight days. How lovely is that? I am taking books and crocheting and hiking boots and beads and hang out comfy clothes.

I am so excited!

Monday, August 06, 2007

That durn dream again....


I keep having that dream that I never dropped the class that I never went to, and missed writing all the papers and it was a required class but I couldn't possibly finish the papers if I wanted and I am going to get an F because I never tied up the loose ends and every time I go to find my advisor she is always NOT in her office but I see her on campus busy doing wonderful things and I am going to get "found out" and in spite of having my degree and graduating, I keep thinking this loose end is going to topple down the house. All in my dream. It shifts time and space and is very agitating.

Think I need a vacation?????

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Finally!


Due to my minds proclivity to wandering, I find when I go to a baseball game, that my thoughts stray to watching and wondering about the other fans there, the murmurs and cheers of the crowd, and general daydreaming. So, I don't always fixate on the game, or keep track of it. Because of this, I seem to always, ALWAYS miss the great plays. Especially seeing Big Papi hit one out of the park...I have been to five games in person this season, and watched a good many on t.v., but I always seem to miss Big Papi! Last night, we were sitting in incredible seats, right at home plate. I missed Papi's first slug out of the park, because I was enjoying such nice conversation with the people who invited us to the game. I cried, "I MISSED IT!!" The next time around, everybody reminded me to focus...and yahoo! I TOTALLY FINALLY SAW BIG PAPI HIT IT STRAIGHT OUT OF THE PARK, VIA CENTER FIELD...it was beautiful!
My life is complete!

Monday, July 30, 2007

my brain, part two..this was my strong second choice

Your Brain's Pattern

Your mind is a creative hotbed of artistic talent.
You're always making pictures in your mind, especially when you're bored.
You are easily inspired to think colorful, interesting thoughts.
And although it may be hard to express these thoughts, it won't always be.

(you had to choose the one you were most drawn to..the red/orange one caught my eye immediately, so first choice...but this one I really, really, really liked....

my brain, compliments of

Your Brain's Pattern

Your mind is a firestorm - full of intensity and drama.
Your thoughts may seem scattered to you most of the time...
But they often seem strong and passionate to those around you.
You are a natural influencer. The thoughts you share are very powerful and persuading.

Processing Counselor, a new member of revgalblogpals had these fun brain pattern quizzes on her blog. Thanks!

Sunday, July 29, 2007

babies, babies, babies, oh baby!



The past few weeks, my mind and heart have been obsessed with babies. I see pregnant women everywhere. Parenting and children are the center of storyline and plots of the books and magazines I have been reading. Baby, baby, baby, oh baby! I got babies on my mind. However, I have consciously made a decision to NOT have children, for multiple reasons, one being that I am a month shy of 44, and even if I did have a baby, through adoption or by giving birth, I would be of retirement age when s/he was in college. Not for me, perhaps for some.

My partner and I decided that if we had met ten years ago, things would be different. But in the five years we have been together, it is only in very recent history that we could even realistically ponder the question. Frankly,it just seems too late to even try (my partner is six years longer down the journey of life than I am). In spite of all the clarity, and feeling good about our decision, it is still hard for me. Especially in my perimenopausal state of mind.

I honestly never really thought that I wouldn't have a baby...or that I would choose NOT to have a child...come to think of it, I have never even conceived through, oh, say, an accident.
I often wonder what it would feel like to be pregnant...to actually give birth...and what my little girl or boy might have looked like. I am a TLC Baby Story nut. I cry every time a loving couple gives birth.

I love birth.

The truth is I love babies...and I love children. I am blessed to be in ministry with children and families, and to have many friends with delightful children in whom I celebrate and cherish.

The truth is, I could really be an awful parent...I can be pretty self-absorbed.

The truth is, having a child has not been a priority for me, and I certainly have a full life without children.

The truth is, it is the right decision for us.

The truth is, I still wonder if....

The truth is, it makes me a little sad sometimes...missing out on being a mom, missing out on that part of life....with all its challenges, heartaches, frustrations, and wonderments.

I think I need a ritual...to connect my mind and heart and body to the reality of the good and wise decision of my spouse and I. To simply be able to let go any residual longings I have...to let go of my baby thoughts, and channel that loving energy somewhere else.

So...what about this? Am I alone in my mid-life crisis, non-motherhood status? What do other people do, when they find themselves where I find myself today?

Friday, July 27, 2007

Green Friday Five



RevGals are pondering global warming, extreme weather patterns, and wondering where/what/how the prophetic voice of faith fits in all of it. Here is the Friday Five, living lightly, faithfully, and greenly in our Creation home.

1. Have you experienced living through an extreme weather event- what was it and how did you cope? Although I lived in coastal states for almost twenty years, I can't say I experienced a terrifying extreme weather event. That being said, there was an ice storm that pretty much knocked out power in a major metropolitan area for almost a week near Christmas. I just packed up my dogs and stayed with a friend. Another freaky thing was a snowstorm that turned to complete ice, and someone from my congregation asked me to see if I could get to the school where several of children of the congregation were, because parents couldn't get there. I had no idea the level of iciness, and having grown up in upper midwest, figured this would be no problem at all....until I turned out of the driveway and slid a full length of block down the street. I called them back and said it wasn't safe, AT ALL. It took my beloved six hours to get home from a normal 30 minute commute--it was nuts.


2. How important is it that we wake up to issues such as global warming? I don't even consider global warming an issue--it is a fact. In fact, I heard Rabbi Arthur Waskow call it global scorching. It is up to us to do whatever we can, politically and personally to contribute to stopping, or slowing its effects. It is a sin to hand this on to our children.

3. The Christian message needs to include stewardship of the earths resources agree/ disagree? Agree! Isn't that one of the instructions God gives in the garden of Eden? To be stewards of all that is created?


And because it is summer- on a brighter note....



4. What is your favourite season and why? Fall, fall, fall fall.....it used to be spring when I lived in the south; but New England springs not so...abundant? But fall--oh my, apple picking and beautiful trees turning glorious shades from holding all that light and crisp evening walks with shorts and sweaters....I just love it.



5. Describe your perfect vacation weather....It's funny, but I like a mix of weather. A little bit of rain slows one down, to snuggle in and read all day, and the sunny weather pulls you out to hike. (Most of my vacations center around where we can be outside...and hike!)

Sunday, July 22, 2007

a Sunday prayer....


for being open
to letting go...
and allowing You,
sweet breeze of Spirit
to infuse
to restore
to renew
my heart, body, soul, and mind.
Amen.

Personality Quiz, Harry Potter Style

PeaceBang had this quiz over on her site and so I took it. I thought all the Harry Potter RevGirl's would like it, especially when they emerge from the reading of The Last Book. I can't get the width right on the screen, but I scored Hermione Granger, hands over hands!
You scored as Hermione Granger, You're one intelligent witch, but you have a hard time believing it and require constant reassurance. You are a very supportive friend who would do anything and everything to help her friends out.

Hermione Granger

80%

Albus Dumbledore

70%

Draco Malfoy

65%

Ron Weasley

65%

Remus Lupin

55%

Sirius Black

50%

Harry Potter

40%

Severus Snape

30%

Lord Voldemort

25%

Ginny Weasley

25%

Your Harry Potter Alter Ego Is...?
created with QuizFarm.com

Friday, July 20, 2007

Friday Five...for RGBP

1. Share a moment/ time of real encouragement in your journey of faith Encouragement comes to me in connections with people....and it seems that even just this week, there have been several moments of real, honest connections in the most random places--a restaurant, the pottery studio, and a note from a friend.

2. Do you have a current vision / dream for your work/ family/ministry? yup. Rainbows of dreams. In my current position, I simply want to be faithful to the work set before me, and help my congregation grow in vibrant and healthy ways. Personally, I want to do an advanced degree in clay, pastoral care, and spiritual practise. I dream of being a pet chaplain. In my family, we are not dreaming but working hard on living more healthy.

3.Money is no object and so you will.....
Just play in clay a little more, and travel a little more, but I would still be in ministry, No question.

4. How do you see your way through the disappointments? What keeps you going? Breathing. stopping. And talking with my beloved.

5. How important are your roots? Are you talking hair?
My spiritual and cultural roots anchor me, help ground me in who I am. Pretty important, especially as I wade into the perimenopausal phase of my precious life.

6. Bonus= what would you like to add I am going to go to Cleveland next week to see the Sox play Cleveland. I CAN'T WAIT!!!

Thursday, July 19, 2007

Terra Cotta carved bowl

 

 

 

 


This is a bowl from the spring. I shaped it over a form, and then carved it. It is my first hand-built bowl. It was really hard for me to do, because throwing is so much faster, and in carving/handbuilding, you have to think about so many different things, and it never gets the balanced, centered look of a thrown pot. Which is fine, of course. I learned from this bowl that when carving/decorating, you have to keep looking at it from different angles, and especially the angle from which it will eventually rest. You can tell I carved this upside down, and forgot to flip it back and forth. The funky flowers are more easily viewed upside down! The low fire glazes are painted on...and because they are low fire, they can be bright. I like the turquoise and the blues; the dark background of the bowl I am not thrilled with, but in all, it was an interesting process for me.
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bowl

 

 

 


This is a bowl I made earlier this summer, and it is the first time I have used the hi-fire reduction glazes in this studio. It is granny smith over a matte white, which you can see made the whole bowl sort of a greeny yellow. My camera isn't good enough to catch the streaks, but I am pleased with the shape, weight, volume of the bowl, and the look of the yummy reduction glazes. There is more depth to them rather than in a regular electric kiln. I haven't had much time for this class I am in now, but everytime I go, I sink back into the clay. I really need to do a better job of focusing on my style (and getting the focus right on the camera!) and taking the time to create. It is such healing, restoring, nurturing, growing, spiritual work for me, my hands deep in clay...
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