Saturday, December 29, 2007

cold and homeless and I don't feel safe to help....

So, I am sitting in my office at church and am the only one here. I am working on my sermon and other things...and the doors are locked--to my office, and outside. The church, although in a nice part of town, is at the intersection of many bus stops and through routes, and next to a park, so we get some traffic from people seeking assistance. It is also a bitter cold rainy wintery day. This young man, outside my window, is trying to get into the door that really isn't ever open. So we talked through my window. He said he was looking for help...and I said I couldn't help him right now. I told him he could come back for AA later on. He wanted the "preacher" (obviously I WASNT the preacher, b/c I wouldn't let him in). He asked if there was a library, or if he could at least come in. He was cold, and I don't blame him. I pointed him to the public library. As the only person here, and as a woman, I just didn't feel safe. I know that most transient people are not dangerous, but I just couldn't let him in to hang out. I feel guilty...in spite of knowing it was the right thing to do--I have done this in the past, but this was the worst weather ever I have had to turn someone away. It feels even hypocritical to offer a prayer for him...but God, please...forgive me...and help him find warmth on this day.
Amen.

4 comments:

zorra said...

Karlajean, I know it hurt you to do this. But it would have been so unwise to let him in under these circumstances. Other RevGals have posted before about exactly this dilemma. It is a hard thing.

BTW, thanks for stopping by...

revhipchick said...

it just sucks. it sucks for you, for him, for all of us who have and will be in those positions again. i'm sorry.

DogBlogger said...

Oh, yes, does it ever suck. I hate when doing the right thing feels so crummy.
((((Karlajean))))

Peceli and Wendy's Blog said...

Perhaps it's because Peceli is from a Pacific Island that he almost never says no to someone asking for help. It means we are overwhelmed at times with too many demands.
But at the moment I am the one getting a call for help (by phone or email) from a young woman crying her heart out and Peceli says hurry up we are late for a dinner somewhere with one of HIS friends!
w.
w.